“Heaven’s the place where all the dogs you’ve loved come to greet you.”
                                                                                           Unknown Author

One of the most difficult things any pet owner has to deal with is the loss of a beloved pet. When we get a pet, whether from a rescue shelter or from a reputable breeder, we should make a commitment to be there for the duration of its life. Nothing appalls and angers me more than the despicable people who turn old, senior dogs and cats into a shelter just because they are old. Dogs are not throw-aways like some kind of worn-out stuffed toy! Old dogs are just like old people. They suffer from arthritis and various aches and pains; they may develop chronic diseases; the hearing and the eyesight may dim; and sometimes incontinence shows up! That adorable puppy grows into the sleek, mature adult who then morphs gradually into the senior with a white muzzle.

The decision of whether or not to euthanize a pet is truly the most awesome decision a pet owner will ever have to face. I deliberately use the term awesome, not in the trite, banal way it is used today, “You look awesome!” “That outfit is awesome!” Rather, I use it with the true definition of the word, meaning full of reverence, awe, and wonder. The question that haunts us is how will I know when it is “time”? There is no simple, easy answer for that question. Basically, it comes down to objectively determining the pet’s quality of life. Can she get up and walk by herself? Is she still eating and drinking? Does she still seem to be enjoying life or is she slowly withdrawing from the things she once enjoyed?

I worked as a Hospice nurse for several years and saw way too many deaths. What I have seen, both with human patients and with our pets, is a calm acceptance of death and a waiting for the end to come. With my human patients, all we could do was try to ease their pain and wait until it was their time to cross over to the Other Side. With our pets we can help them over that insurmountable border, something we cannot do for our human loved ones. This is such a huge responsibility!

Sadly, last Friday we faced this heart-breaking decision with Mandy, one of our two Irish Setters. She was a beautiful girl; her Mom and Dad were both Grand Champions. The breeder tried to convince us to show her, but that wasn’t a life we wanted for her or for us. You may recall that in October 2016 I wrote a piece about her health issues in “Blind Dogs See with Their Hearts.” Her diabetes had remained in fairly good control, but the huge benign tumor in her leg finally grew too severe and impaired her ability to walk on her own. Now, we were more than willing to continue helping her get up and move about, but I think she just gave up and was ready to go. She stopped eating and was barely drinking. Being a nurse, I could see the signs of the body shutting down. So, with heavy hearts, we arranged for her to go to the Rainbow Bridge.

Our veterinarian came to the house. He was very caring and compassionate. She passed peacefully with no pain and didn’t even wake up during that final injection. After she was gone, he took her body with him to be cremated for us. Once they were gone, the three of us, her “sister,” Caley, Bill, and I were all in a state of grief and distress. Dogs know and understand when the life force leaves the body. You can tell that the other dog realizes that her lifelong buddy is gone. Saturday was also a tough day for all of us, our first full day without her. You find yourself second-guessing your decision. Should we have waited longer? Would she have gotten better? Even though you know the answer is no, you beat yourself up with all the what-ifs. I certainly didn’t want her to be in pain and suffer, but it was so very hard to let her leave!

Each day gets a little easier. We have made an extra effort to take Caley for more walks and outings with lots of extra treats. Then, when you least expect it, some little something reminds you of her, and the tears well up again. On Monday I was walking around, upstairs and downstairs, taking up the little scent discs that helped her navigate around the house. As I peeled them off of furniture and walls, thinking we don’t need these any more, my heart cracked a bit more! All of us who have lost a deeply loved pet have had moments like this, that sudden heart-wrenching memory of the little one who is no longer there with us.

I think each pet we lose to death takes a little piece of our heart along with it. I firmly believe that we will all be reunited one day, and all of those little pieces of our hearts will again be made whole. That may be why I like the analogy of the Rainbow Bridge so much. What could be more wonderful than being greeted by our loving pets, now healed and youthful again, when we too cross over that final Bridge!

Well-meaning friends and relatives ask “When are you going to get another dog?” “You should get another one.” There is something about the loss of a dear pet that reminds us of our own mortality, especially as we get older. What if I should die before my pet? To me that is a totally distressing thought! When my Mother was close to death, her one over-riding concern was for the welfare of her two cats that she was leaving behind. Once my sister and I had them safely adopted into new forever homes, it was as if she breathed a sigh of relief and gave herself permission to move on to the next chapter. 

Good-bye, little Mandy. To paraphrase Shakespeare a bit,

Now cracks a noble heart. Good-night, sweet Princess,
And flights of angels sing thee to thy rest!

 

 

 

©Eclectic Grandma, 2018